I carve a painful sonnet down the curve of her back  
For a love I have never spoken, written once then erased  
I can't compete with rockstars  
their faces plastered on mtvs and rolling stones  
they paint a throttled picture of paradise thin as supermodels and twice as fuckable  
 
But I know your secret heartaches, heartbreaks,  
the rapid beating your heart makes  
midnight calls to the receptive, the captive  
bound by furtive glances, light touches  
accidental and interactive  
 
I know the places you escape to  
When you feel your self crumble, feel your heart rumble  
no one there for you  
no one to lift you, hold you, save you  
 
And when you're lost  
When you're lonely  
the one and only  
will you phone me?  
 
tell me lies to test me?  
'cause the truth is more painful  
more precious  
moremoremore  
 
Let me tell you a story, not of blind ambition  
or heroics won by strength  
but of struggling endurance when my strength failed me  
I'll tell you a story of being brought to my knees  
stripped of any physical dignity  
...and how I survived the cold winter of my soul  
forcing myself to jump over my shadow  
again, then again, and again  
 
I'll tell you a story of how I loved someone  
and never spoke it  
'cause the game was over before it even began  
won by heroes of undeniable talent, good looks and fame  
she enters a world of more of the same  
and love is never best served cold  
 
I wish I could tell you suicide poems  
standing on the edge of tall building poems  
- gun to mouth poems  
but my will will not let me  
give in to what controls me, extorts me, contorts me  
 
How do you catch a shooting star?  
close your eyes, prepare for the burn  
Then burn  
 
Lay your small hands upon my chest  
Tell me: who do you love best?  
count down your finger list of  
the best dressed, least stressed, most caressed  
Am I on this list? Do I meet the test?  
 
I don't fit your pretty mold  
I don't rise to your threshold  
- out in the cold  
 
I'll tell you this much, and don't forget, never forget:  
I am a Cirque du Soleil spectacle  
I would leave you wide-eyed amazed  
a gasp would rise at my unveiling  
and you would gratefully lay your naked body at my feet  
in grateful defeat  
 
I'll tell you this much, and don't forget, never forget  
I am that which you lack  
are you fond of what you lack?  
And did you know this is about you?  
 
How do you catch a shooting star?  
best to watch from afar  
but if you must, armor your heart in asbestos, kevlar and  
diamond coat steel.  
Flag a passing comet,  
rise to the challenge  
prepare for defeat  
and the taste of ashes  
give up before you start  
sacrifice your heart  
prepare for the burning  
your single heart yearning  
and burn.